Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
