This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
