I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
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