holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
