i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
