white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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