So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
