are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Randomize
