i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Everyone says I win the strip club
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
