Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Randomize
