i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize