Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Randomize
