i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
