The brown eye won't let me do that either.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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