Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
