The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
