I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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