Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
