whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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