she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize