I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize