is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
