This girl is more easily done than said...
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
