I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
