windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
