He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize