so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize