If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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