he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
