I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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