i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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