But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
