She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
