ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i think my tv is drunk
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
