im gay
i know
yea but for you.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
