Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
