why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I need a burrito and a hug.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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