I don't remember. Are we still dating?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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