Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You took a bar mat shot.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
