Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
