just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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