also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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