i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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