he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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