also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
