I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
