Me. At least after what I've been through.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Randomize
