Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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