8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just forgot I was standing up.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
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