I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize
