is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
