we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize